When it comes to pulling together an easy backyard arrangement for a dinner party or gathering at your home, it’s tempting to “shop” the yards of those around you—a little snip here, a little trim there. Perhaps your next door neighbor has a much fuller magnolia tree, or your acquaintance down the street grows dozens upon dozens of lovely roses. But while you may be inclined to sneak just a few clippings here and there without asking permission—Surely they wouldn’t mind! They have so many!—doing so is a no-no, according to one etiquette expert.
Diane Gottsman is a national etiquette expert and a trusted authority on modern manners, professional presence, and social savvy. Diane is the founder of The Protocol School of Texas.
Is It Okay To Cut Flowers/Foliage From A Neighbor’s Yard Without Asking?
Credit:
Ngoc Minh Ngo
“Even if it’s a great friend and good neighbor, you would not clip flowers or magnolia leaves from someone’s tree or plant without permission,” says Diane Gottsman, national etiquette expert and founder of The Protocol School of Texas.
There are a number of reasons it’s best to seek permission before pulling out the garden shears, she notes. “Someone may see you [help yourself] and do the same. The neighbor may not want their foliage to be tampered with.”
While the yard may be easily accessible from a public sidewalk, it should still be treated with the respect you’d show the interior of someone’s home. “Much like you would not go into someone’s home and borrow clothes from their closet without permission, their trees, plants, and flowers have great meaning,” says Gottsman. “And unless you have been invited to take something at will, always ask first.”
The One Exception to the Rule
Cydonia oblonga is the main type of quince grown for its fruit.
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There is one notable exception, she acknowledges: A fruit tree that extends into your yard. “If a neighbor has a fruit tree that falls into your yard, feel free to enjoy the fruit,” she says. On the other hand, “If you walk your dog every morning and admire their beautiful fig tree or orange tree, it’s not an invitation to take a piece of fruit without the neighbor offering. A good neighbor with an abundance of fruit will more than likely bring you a basket of beautiful lemons on occasion, but please don’t help yourself.”
Moral of the story: Do like your mama told you and keep your hands to yourself—unless your neighbor’s given you express permission to plunder their garden.
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